Menstrual Cycles: Why Understanding Our Phases Through Motherhood Changes Everything

How many of us mummas truly understand what’s going on in our bodies each month? I mean, really understand. For years, I had no idea about the four menstrual cycle phases, let alone how to recognise the signs of PMS or even know the difference between PMS, PMDD, and PME (I hadn’t even heard of PME until recently!).

It wasn’t until I started tracking my cycle and symptoms that I realised why I’d often feel overwhelmed, snappy, and totally ‘touched out’ at certain times. That feeling of ‘everything is too much’? It’s not me being a terrible person or a bad mum, it’s part of my menstrual cycle, and there’s a reason behind it.

In this episode of the Mumma Matters series, I sat down with single mum and PMDD sufferer, Kasi. After years of struggling with PMDD, she became a menstrual coach to better understand every phase, every hormone shift, and how these affect our mental load as mums. Spoiler alert: it’s not just about periods.

The Four Phases of the Menstrual Cycle (And What They Mean for Mums)

Menstruation Phase (Inner Winter)- This is when your period begins

Day 1 of your cycle. Your body sheds what it no longer needs. Think of it as your inner winter: a time for slowing down and resting, just like nature does.
But let’s face it, mum life doesn’t exactly allow us to hibernate.
What you can do is lean into rest when possible. Cancel non-essential plans, ask for help, and let some things go (like the washing-up). It’s not selfish, it’s self-preservation. Your body is doing important work, and it needs you to prioritise yourself.

Top tip: Let your kids know! If they’re old enough, say, “Mummy’s on her period and needs some quiet today.” Not only are you helping yourself, but you’re also teaching your kids about bodies and boundaries.

 

Follicular Phase (Inner Spring)
After your period ends, oestrogen rises, and you may suddenly feel like yourself again. More energy, more motivation, and more of those “I’ve got this” vibes. This is your inner spring, a fresh start.
It’s the perfect time to plan playdates, tackle household projects, or get creative at work if you run your own business. You might feel like ticking off that to-do list you avoided last week.
Just remember: this phase is a transition, so if you still feel sluggish for a few days, that’s perfectly normal. Be gentle with yourself, your energy will return.

Ovulation Phase (Inner Summer)
This is your peak energy phase. You might feel your most confident and social. Ovulation is your inner summer. You may even feel physically glowing.
It’s a great time to schedule important meetings, go on family days out, or simply enjoy being at your best. However, be cautious about overcommitting yourself, this “go-go-go” energy might overwhelm you later if you’re not careful.

Note: If you struggle with anxiety or sensory overload, this burst of energy can sometimes tip you into overwhelm. Tune in to your body and how it feels, not just what your cycle is telling you.

Luteal Phase (Inner Autumn)
The premenstrual phase, or “inner autumn.” This phase often gets a bad rap, and for good reason. It’s the longest phase and can bring mood swings, irritability, low energy, sensory overload, and, of course, PMS.
But here’s the thing: understanding what’s happening hormonally can help you navigate it better. This phase is when your body is trying to set boundaries, there’s a natural desire to say “no” to things that drain you.
Tip: Use this phase to honour your needs. Say no to tasks or activities that feel too much, and don’t feel guilty about it.

What Is PMS?

Premenstrual Syndrome (PMS) is that familiar shift in mood, energy, and patience before your period. You may feel irritable, tired, or overwhelmed, but you’re still functioning. It’s a normal part of the cycle, though not exactly fun.
Instead of pushing through, take this as your body’s way of saying, “I need a break.” It’s the perfect time to slow down and prioritise rest.

What Is PMDD?

Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder (PMDD) is like PMS, but far more intense. We’re talking debilitating mental health symptoms, such as severe depression, rage, extreme anxiety, and even dark thoughts.
PMDD is not “just hormones” and requires support. Unlike PMS, which is annoying but manageable, PMDD is medical and requires proper care. The good news is it tends to disappear once your period starts, which can be confusing.
If you suspect you might have PMDD, you're not alone, and there is help available. Tracking your cycle can be an essential first step in understanding your symptoms.

Motherhood & the Menstrual Cycle

Let’s be honest, trying to parent while dealing with all of this, It’s overwhelming. Our cycles aren’t the same each month, and the way we react to our hormones changes constantly, especially with sleepless nights, work stress, and managing a household.
But when you start tracking your cycle, you start to understand yourself on a deeper level. You learn to plan around your phases, manage expectations, and speak to yourself (and your family) with more compassion.

It goes from “Why am I like this?” to “Ah, I’m in my luteal phase. I need to take it easy.”

Kasi's Five Things You Can Do Today To Help Mum Life Through Your Menstrual Cycle

1. Track your cycle
   Use an app (I love Stardust!) or a journal. Start on Day 1 of your period and note how you feel each day.

2. Name your energy givers and drainers
   Identify what lifts you up and what leaves you flat. Write them down as part of your cycle toolkit.

3. Have open conversations with your kids
   Keep it simple: “Mummy’s feeling tired today, so I need your help.” This teaches your kids emotional awareness and boundaries.

4. Plan with your cycle in mind
   If you know you’re entering your luteal phase, avoid scheduling activities like playdates or big outings. Your future self will thank you.

5. Give yourself grace
   You’re not lazy or snappy for no reason. You’re navigating a body that’s shifting daily. You deserve support, not shame.

Meet Kasi Reid

Kasi Reid is the founder of Flo and Thrive, a menstrual cycle coach, aromatherapist, and passionate advocate for cyclical living. Her journey began as a working single mum facing anxiety and mood swings. After tracking her cycle, she was diagnosed with PMDD, which led her to explore hormonal health and natural remedies. Combining her aromatherapy expertise with menstrual cycle awareness, Kasi created The FLO Method, a program designed to help women align their lives with their cycles. Through coaching and self-care products, she empowers women to move from burnout to balance, embracing their cyclical nature.