Happiness is not a constant, it is a journey
I have spent many years with the belief that if I achieved certain goals then I would find true happiness. It felt like it was the ultimate goal I was constantly striving for.
One of those goals was to become a mum, once I did this I would tick it off my life goals and would be truly happy. Only this didn't really happen (or so I thought). Motherhood was not the experience I had imagined. It was hard, lonely, tiring... the list goes on. Add a 2nd child and a massive hit to my mental health and this was certainly not the goal of happiness I had been working towards. There was no fanfare at the end or a gold medal for getting there. This left me feeling like a failure, like I was the only one who wasn't a happy mum.
What Is The Definition Of Happiness
Happiness is an emotional state characterized by feelings of joy, satisfaction, contentment, and fulfilment. While happiness has many different definitions, it is often described as involving positive emotions and life satisfaction. (Verywell Mind)
Happiness, in psychology, a state of emotional well-being that a person experiences (Britannica)
Through my journey trying to better my mental wellbeing I have come to realise that happiness is not the end point, it is a constant journey of finding ways to experience joy, purpose, satisfaction, health.
The definition of happiness will be different for every mum
Our emotions through the day, week, month, life are a rollercoaster. They go from highs to lows and are constantly changing. That's ok! We need to feel sad, paid etc it makes us human. Having small pockets of happiness helps us get through those lower points.
How do I find more happiness in my day?
Turning negative thoughts into positives
This is much easier said then done, I know! I can get to the end of the day and feel like I have failed or it has been a bad day. Maybe the kids have been playing up, my anxiety might feel overwhelming or I have missed just being able to go for a walk without having to battle 2 kids on scooters. It is so easy for me to get fixated on everything that went wrong, how I could have done better but I am trying really hard to counteract those thoughts. That walk was really stressful and I got frustrated but... I loved seeing them run around the park, laughing as we played chase etc.
I use my HappySelf Journal to find 3 things I have enjoyed about my day to help this.
Release Your Happy Hormones
This can be really hard as a mum to find time to do things that bring you joy but it can be really easy way to add a little happiness to your day.
For me, Yoga brings me joy, it relaxes me, I feel physically and mentally better for it.
Dancing like no one is watching, sometimes just putting on a great song and dancing in my kitchen (maybe with the kids) makes me smile so much. That feeling of release or connecting with my kids in a fun way to release the endorphins and happy hormones.
Can you find something simple and easy to add to your day or week to bring you a little extra pocket of happiness?
Happy Mumma Hugs
It may sound silly but did you know hugs are amazing for releasing oxytocin and serotonin, part of the happy hormone family. Hugs are so powerful, they can be calming, give a sense of security, love and connection so go find a little one and give them a big, long squeeze.
Motherhood and Happiness
These are 3 quick ways I use to help me find little pockets of happiness in my mum life, but the most important thing to remember is you don't need to feel happy all the time. Have a think about what happiness means to you, how can add little moments of happiness to your day to create a little of bubble of happiness around you so that when you are on the low of the rollercoaster it can comfort you and help you climb back up.
If you want to take your happiness with you or remind yourself of your happy affirmation, shop the Super Mumma Happy Collection